Trauma and Addiction
I walked into Morningside Recovery a broken mess. 44-years-old and nearly dead. I used methamphetamines for 30 of my 44 years.I always believed something was broken in me. I recently found out that I’m recovering from trauma and dealing with PTSD due to something terrible that happened 25 years ago.
During my first two weeks at Morningside Recovery I participated in a variety of groups including Coping with Urges, Love or Addiction, and Women’s Issues. During the third week I walked into a group called Sexuality and Feelings. I can’t explain exactly what happened. I welled up with tears, couldn’t breathe, and ran out of the group. I have been holding back a dam of so much pain that it finally burst.
Recovering from Trauma
Eventually I started to breathe again, but the thought of going back to that class terrified me. This time I sat down and listened, tears streaming down my cheeks. Instead of running, I screamed out: “I need to cry, I can’t stop.” Everyone let me cry. They were there at my most vulnerable moment, and that moment was the most therapeutic breakthrough I’ve ever experienced.
When the tears subsided, I was able to share that my husband, the father of our two sons and one precious daughter, betrayed us all those many years ago. He was my first love, and the root of so much trauma and pain.
When my daughter was three I put him in prison for molesting her. It broke me as a woman and as a mother. I have carried so much blame, shame, anger, and addiction.
After I shared, other clients started sharing their trauma. A lot of tears were shed. I let go of a lot and received understanding and compassion from others. The group facilitator gave me the time to let it all go. He reassured all of us that there is no right or wrong answer. There are no judgments.
There is a very special thing that happens in that group that words can never describe. The only thing that comes to mind is ‘Lighter.’ I’m blameless, shameless, and not living through addiction anymore.
Blog by Melanie W., Morningside Recovery client
Rehab with Morningside Recovery
If Melanie’s story resonates with you, then there’s also help out there for you. When you’re recovering from trauma at Morningside Recovery, you’ll find a community of people in similar situations who are ready to support you. We offer many rehab programs to help people from all walks of life, including:
- Jewish recovery for alcohol and drugs
- LGBTQ substance abuse
- Christian recovery program
- Couples counseling and treatment
If you’re ready to start working towards a healthier and happier life, call us today at 855-631-2135. Recovery is possible, you just have to take the first step.